Thursday, March 24, 2011

Hate List

Anyone who watches Tosh.0 knows what I'm about to write. A Hate List. A list of things that you hate. The things that just drive you fucking nuts. Hate is a very strong word, and I honestly don't hate too many things, but there are enough that I was able to compile the list that follows. So, in no particular order, here's my Hate List.
  • The MBTA. Pretty much everything about it, but especially this particular scenario: You're on the T, it's crowded, getting on and off is a hassle for everyone. Your stop is next and you're making a mental game plan of how you're going to maneuver off the train once you get there. Suddenly you feel an annoying tap-tap-tapping at your shoulder. Someone, usually an overweight cat lady type woman or a small balding man with glasses, is elbowing you saying, "My stop is next! I need to get off!" Uh...ME TOO, BUDDY. Patience is a virtue and there is NO need to push to the door while the train is still moving. I've honestly never seen someone not be able to get off where they needed to. Keep your pants on and we'll all make it together.
  • When people wear gauges in their ears. THAT DOESN'T LOOK COOL.
  • When someone tells you something, whether it be a juicy piece of gossip or a random interesting fact, and try to pass it off like their own knowledge...when YOU were the one that told them in the first place.
  • Hayden Panettiere.
  • When people pronounce it "ape-ricot."
  • When people mispronounce words. Even worse is that I can't correct them without looking like a total asshole.
  • Men with long fingernails. So gross. I don't even care if you play the guitar, it's disgusting. Cut that shit.
  • Women who wear sneakers to work with their business suits. You look fucking ridiculous. Ballet flats were invented for a reason.
Your turn, people. What drives you up a fucking wall?
Let it out and let the healing begin!

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