Monday, August 9, 2010

Thoughts on: The Ocean

Vacation. Yes, I am on vacation right now. Only for four days but it's a vacation nonetheless. Not that I work so hard that I need a break, but... sometimes you just need to escape the sameness of every day life, you know? The things that plague me on a daily basis that I try not to let bother me. The whole same shit, different day thing. I had to get away from it.

It couldn't have come at a better time for me either. Lucky for me my aunt owns a condo in Myrtle Beach, SC. And lucky for me my parents and brother were heading down there for 10 days. Even luckier that Dad was willing to provide the plane ticket.

And so I left Boston at 5:53 am on Saturday morning, after a whole night of that SSDD that I was talking about before, feeling tired. Weary in my bones, weary in my soul. I needed an escape. Seeing my parents waiting for me at the airport was an instantaneous lift. I could literally feel my batteries recharging. But as I was running from our blanket in the sand to the water like a 5 year old all I could think about was water.

My studies in literature and film tell me that water signifies rebirth, a spiritual cleansing. And as my feet sink into the cool, wet sand, I know this to be true. But why? Why when I stand with the sand between my toes and the water splashing up my legs, staring out out out into infinity do I feel better? And when I take that first plunge into the sea and come up rubbing the salt out of my eyes, why do I feel like a new person? What is it about the ocean?

I don't think it's because my studies have conditioned me to feel that way. I really don't. Just one dip in the ocean and I could literally feel the things that have been bothering me wash away. I don't have an answer for my earlier question. I don't even care about the answer, to be honest. I'm just basking in the glory of this phenomenon.

We have a tradition in our family - any time we are on vacation, we get up very early at least one day to watch the sun rise. It's a seriously great tradition and this morning I felt more grateful for it than ever. Watching the waves come in, one after the other, hearing them crash over and over again, seeing the sun, golden and hot, peeping through the clouds to smile down on us for the first time today... I feel more refreshed and peaceful than I have in a long time. The problems I escaped from at home are still there, waiting for me, but now I feel ready to face them head on.

"The world doesn't seem such a howling wilderness as it did last night."

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